Relationship break ups can be devastating for both parties involved.
In some cases, to make the situation lighter and perhaps out of guilt the dumper may offer to stay being friends after the relationship is over. It may actually seem like a good idea logically speaking. After all, you were there for each other before so why not keep the friend part. However, the truth is more often than not that is simply not how things usually go.
Unless there are kids and other more important things involved, closing the chapter of your life with your ex can put you in the better place rather than staying strung with any relationship with them. Read on to find out why staying friends with your ex can mean dirty business.
Why Remaining Friends after a Breakup May Not Be a Good Idea
It can be much harder for you and your partner to move on.
If you remain in touch with your friends it may fuel hope. It will keep your focus from moving on and embracing a new chapter in your life.
There’s a big chance that one of you feels more strongly about the other.
Not all breakups are mutual. One of the couple may still be holding on to some romantic feelings for the other. This is risky for backslides and can result to a painful cycle of heartache and confusion.
You have been intimate.
Maintaining a strictly platonic relationship with someone you have been intimate with is tricky. Most of the time exes who try to remain too close to one another end up back in bed and things will only get murkier.
Staying friendly with your ex can cause conflict in your new relationship.
Staying friends with an ex can be a recipe for disaster to a new relationship. Consider how your new flame will feel. Why make him or her uncomfortable and make things weird?
It’s simply is not healthy.
When you maintain friendship with an ex, lines can get blurred easily. You may fall into pattern of hope and despair and trap you in a toxic situation. So why not just shake the dust off and focus on loving yourself more and eventually finding someone really worth your time and effort?
It’s Okay to Remain friends with your Ex, but…
Overall, there are couples who manage to stay friends with there exes. But as a rule of thumb, after a breakup you will need to have some time and space apart.
That said, you shouldn’t try to be friends with your ex-partner immediately after you have decided to call it quits.
When you decide you want to stay friends with your ex, see to it that you check your motives and intentions first.
Is it because it is more practical and civil to stay friends with him or her? Or, because you still have romantic feelings for your ex? If your answer is the latter, you’re better off throwing the idea outside the window.
Staying friends with your ex can only prolong your agony and the process of moving on. So, before you jump out to the idea of keeping an ex in the friend zone, consider if friendship is really what you want and consider whether or not it’s going to be worth the risks possible.