Goodbyes are never easy. Break ups can be rough. When you’ve finally decided to break up with someone, telling it to the person whom you have loved once is not going to be a work in the park. It can be just as emotionally toiling.
Below are seven tips on how to end a relationship with someone properly:
Be sure to break up with someone in person.
Unless your partner is known for violent outbursts and extremely manipulative behavior, it’s always best to break up with someone in person.
Resist the urge to simply text, email, or call someone no matter how much you want to avoid conflict.
Choose the proper timing and the right place.
Choose the right timing. Don’t drop the bombshell during a special occasion or if your partner is about to report to work.
Choose a conducive place where both of you can discuss with some privacy.
Be honest and straightforward without being cruel.
Avoid dragging the process by beating around the bush and sugarcoating or using the overused “It’s not you, it’s me” line.
Don’t go telling your partner about the list of things you dislike about him. Stop making things messier by blaming, criticizing, bad mouthing and putting the person down. Be transparent and direct to the point on why you have to end the relationship.
Prepare yourself for a bad reaction and be sure not to be swayed by their response.
Expect your partner to react emotionally. He or she may be agitated, upset or burst into tears. Give your partner a time to vent out on how he or she feels.
Offer comfort when needed but avoid going too far. If you think your partner is vulnerable to be left alone, call someone like his or her close friend for assistance before you leave.
Do not offer false hope in hopes to palliate their sadness.
You may feel guilty when you see your partner emotionally pained but don’t say things like “I’m sorry I didn’t mean it” or give them false hopes.
Unless you really mean it, don’t let your now ex think that you will stay as good friends after the break up. Giving false hopes will only double the injury to the person and make the whole process more painful.
Aim to end up without too much emotional row and be sure to establish boundaries after your breakup.
As much as possible end up the relationship calmly without way too much drama.
Set clear boundaries and explain to your ex-partner that your decision is final.
Give yourself time to heal. Take a moment to enjoy your life after a failed relationship.
Don’t beat yourself up because you think you make the person crappy after ending the relationship.
Take a moment to deal with the heartbreak. Avoid going to places such as your favorite restaurant together that will relive your past with your ex. Your friends and other social support can be your anchor during this difficult time.
Cry if you must but be sure to pick up yourself and embrace the new chapter of your life without your ex-partner.